I haven't been interested in any of my self-assigned creative projects lately. Each morning I bang my head against them - why can't I get this done? I want to be serious about art, and by serious I mean just get myself to the drawing table no matter what. But lately I get there and find *none* of my projects are engaging. I get nowhere with them. The problem is, I'm psyching myself out. In deciding to be serious about art, I'm turning it into work, but also continuing to pressure myself to do it in *all* my free time. It should be fun, but I've made it a burden, and sapped all the joy out of it.
I came up with this way of looking at my current situation, as compared to the ideal balance that brings both productivity and joy:
Later, Mike and I came up with this view, based on Mike's idea of "serious play":
In conclusion, I'm letting go of my projects. It's hard to do, because of that sense of pressing mortality - what if I lose all momentum, and suddenly am 80 years old and didn't do anything? I must continue to *make*.
It's just, for the next few months, I'm going to take the burden out of it, and do it because it's fun and I want to draw.